Have you ever wondered why the voice in your head is so harsh? Or why you might feel afraid to take risks, even when you know they could lead to something great? What's holding you back? Each of us have a complex range of thoughts and emotions that are interacting and shaping our actions and decisions. Within this interpay there are what we can refer to as "Internal saboteurs" — internal patterns of thinking and behaviour that hinder our happiness and success. Internal saboteurs can be powerful and greatly shape our lives. Once we understand them, we can begin to have control over them. Naming them can help us gain awareness so let’s explore the following ten such saboteurs, uncovering their traits and consequences, and learning how to navigate their influence for greater well- being. Not all ten saboteurs are present in everyone. People experience various saboteurs differently, and these patterns can also evolve over time as we mature and our circumstances shift.

The ten types of inner saboteurs include:

The Avoider: The Avoider seeks to maintain positivity and comfort by focusing on the bright side of things, often overlooking challenges. While this approach can help in the short term, it may lead to procrastination and avoidance of necessary tasks or difficult conversations.

The Stickler: The Stickler strives for order and perfection, driven by a desire to excel and achieve greatness. While their attention to detail can be admirable, it may also lead to excessive stress and missed opportunities as they pursue unattainable standards.

The Controller: The Controller's desire to maintain control stems from a place of anxiety and fear. While their leadership and organisation skills can be valuable, their reluctance to delegate and trust others may create tension and frustration in relationships.

The Hyper-Rational: The Hyper-Rational individual values logic and reason, often at the expense of emotional connection. While their analytical approach can be helpful in decision-making, it may also hinder genuine relationships and empathy.

The Hyper-Achiever: The Hyper-Achiever constantly seeks validation through success and accomplishment. While their ambition can drive them to excel, it may also lead to burnout and dissatisfaction as they pursue ever-higher goals.

The Hyper-Vigilant: The Hyper-Vigilant individual is always alert to potential threats, driven by a desire to protect themselves and others. While their vigilance can be helpful in some situations, it may also lead to chronic anxiety and difficulty relaxing.

The Pleaser: The Pleaser seeks acceptance and connection through helping and pleasing others. While their kindness and generosity are admirable, they may neglect their own needs and harbour resentment when their efforts are not reciprocated.

The Restless: The Restless individual craves excitement and new experiences, always seeking the next thrill. While their adventurous spirit can be inspiring, it may also lead to impulsivity and difficulty maintaining focus on long-term goals.

The Victim: The Victim seeks support and empathy by sharing their struggles with others. While their vulnerability can foster connection, it may also perpetuate a sense of helplessness and hinder personal growth.

Remember each saboteur is not inherently negative but more so a pattern of behaviour that can be understood when we develop awareness and compassion for ourselves.

So how do we overcome our internal saboteurs?

Self-Awareness, Identification and Understanding their Origin: The first step in overcoming our internal saboteurs is being aware when they start to try and take over. Now that you have names for them, it may be easier for you to identify them. You can engage in self-reflection activities such as journaling and write down when one of your internal saboteurs took over. What was happening at the moment? This will help you understand patterns and triggers. Another aspect of self-reflection is looking at your past to gain understanding of why the saboteurs were developed. You can ask yourself: What experiences may have shaped them? What beliefs and values do they hold? Once you understand how they were formed and their purpose you can gain further awareness and reflect on the ways in which they no longer serve you.

Receive supportive feedback: when we ask the people we trust for feedback, it can allow us to gain information on patterns or behaviours we have not yet acknowledged. This can be a helpful way to gain awareness of our internal saboteurs. We cannot overcome them when we are not aware of them.

Self-Compassion and patience: Being compassionate towards ourselves can be a helpful way to grow. This involves treating ourselves as we would a friend or loved one. Acknowledge that your internal saboteurs were there for a reason and doing the best they could. To practise self compassion you can engage in mindfulness activities, repeat self-affirmations or even write a letter of encouragement to yourself. Remember that change does not happen overnight, it takes time to break old habits and patterns. Be kind and patient with yourself while you work to overcome your saboteurs.

Therapy: Working with a therapist can be a great way to develop self-awareness and build self-compassion

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