4 Tips For If You Feel Like Therapy Isn’t Working
For a lot of people booking their first session, it may be that you are feeling very impatient or motivated for change. It can feel frustrating, because you may want to feel better now, but major therapeutic changes can take time. Here are a few things to consider if you are feeling at a standstill or impatient in the process.
1. “Progress” Looks Different for Different People: Depending on what brings you into therapy, one of the first goals may be stabilization. So if the first step is “not feeling worse,” it may feel like you aren’t getting “better” (whatever that looks like to you). It’s important to remember that progress is never a straight line: there are ups and downs, and sometimes it can take a while for some lessons and habits to sink in or stick before tackling the next step or issue. In fact, plateaus are perfectly natural and part of the process of getting and feeling better.
2. Talk to Your Therapist About it: It can feel scary to bring up, but talking to your therapist is highly suggested if you aren’t feeling good about your progress. Your therapist’s feelings won’t be hurt – after all, it’s their job to help you! In fact, they will be thankful for you bringing it up and advocating for your wellbeing. Sometimes it might be that you aren’t noticing micro changes (because they are, in fact, micro!) and would benefit from their outside perspective to remind you of the changes you’re making. Other times, it’s helpful for your therapist to know how you’re feeling to reassess what progress looks like. It’s also helpful in case taking another therapeutic approach or tweaking between-session homework is needed. Not all therapeutic approaches will work for everyone, and there are several different options, tweaks, and approaches to try. Everyone is different and deserves a unique treatment plan and approach that works for them.
3. Seeking Out Additional Support: It may be that group therapy would be a good adjunct support for what you’re going through. Hearing about how others are going through something similar to you can feel validating, and they may share some tips of their own that helped them! Your therapist can help you find additional support groups if that’s something you’re interested in.
4. Trying Out a Different Therapist: If all else fails and if you are feeling like you and your therapist aren’t a good personality fit, you can consider talking to them about switching to a different therapist. The most important factor in therapeutic growth is that you feel a connection and rapport with your therapist. The therapeutic relationship can impact consistency with sessions, a good match for between-session homework, and a variety of other things. Remember, it’s not set in stone that you have to stick with your current therapist, and you can even switch back if you feel like that’s the best option for you. Ultimately, it’s about what you feel is best and most helpful for your therapeutic growth. If you do decide to try working with another therapist, you can ask to sign consent forms for your new therapist to be able to see the previous session notes. Either way, what’s most important to remember is change can sometimes take time, and it’s important to remember that your therapist is there to help you and put you first. Your wellbeing is their top priority!